I have kinda always wanted to write this blog entry. The man deserves an internet homage. Plus hopefully it will make him laugh.
So the following are the nicknames, their creators (to the best of my remarkable memory) and in attempted chronological order of usage.
* Fred Flinstone (myself) - This nickname was short lived. Never used outside of the original "Blue House Six" and probably only by us three in the Navigators B-stud. When we first met Zach he was in a "bromance" relationship with his best friend Kevin. Kevin was awesome, brought Zach to Bible study and was really integral at reintroducing Zach to Christ. Zach and Kevin were like Fred and Barney Rubble. This classic duo, different from each other, alike enough to make the friendship work, and just funny to watch. I swear that first semester of the B-stud Greg, Abe, and I would just debrief after Bible study about how funny those two were.
* Dom DeLuise (myself) - Zach came over to the Blue House for a Navigators Halloween party cuz we were gonna ride together. Well he came dressed up like a golfer or a taxi driver with a golf cap/Newsboy cap on his head, a vest - the whole nine yards. He had his trademark beard as well, so he really looked like someone to me, but I could not place it. So I was looking at Zach and it hit me. I jumped up and yelled, "I got it, you guys! Zach looks like Dom DeLuise." I was surprised that some of my roommates did not know what he looked like since he's a pretty famous comedian and was in a ton of 80s-90s Ziploc commercials. There was this great photo on the internet with him wearing the same hat as Zach. That photo was our desktop background for like a month or so. That was a great nickname, but out of respect for the Dom dying on May 4, 2009, I have retired the nickname.
*Z-Pain (Adam and I) - Never used really in public. Just at Adam's moms house while flipping through TV channels and a T-Pain video came on. I said something along the lines that he looked like a black version of Zach, and Adam agreed but also stated that T-Pain looked like a Cabbage Patch Kid.
* Burly Buddy (Abe or Greg) - Zach is built like an ox. Burly means "strongly and heavily built". Great description of Zach.
* Girly Burly (Adam) - Zach is a Man's Man. He knows more about sports than any man should if they are not going into some sports related business. He is also a hopeless romantic and loves chick flicks. So do I, they are good escape movies. But the well balanced mixture found in Zach is unique only to him. Most men are at one end of the spectrum or the other, but not this guy. This nickname was born out of "Burly Buddy".
*Zaqueen (Abe, Jake or I) - This nickname is actually a nicer nickname, created to replace a meaner one (I think most of the Blue House Boys know the one I speak of). This is my favorite one to yell when I see him from a distance. It rushes out of the vocal cords like water from a fire hose. Jake or Abe created the meaner nickname, but Jake put an end to it. He was about the only one of us who was sensitive to Zach at that time, so he suggested to change it. A classic.
* Ben Grimm (myself) -
When the first Fantastic Four film came out in the summer of 2005 I got all the guys together (I think Ad, Greg, Zach, Dean, and Abe) to see it. I liked it, the guys panned it. Almost like a geyser I was just bursting inside with this hilarious idea. So as soon as I got outside I ran around and got in front of everybody and said, "Hey Zach, 'It's clobberin' time.' " "Zach's new nickname is Ben Grimm." He chased me around the parking lot, but could not catch me.
This is probably Zach's least favorite nickname, but in truth probably the best one. Not because he looks like a man whose skin has turned into an orange malleable rock hide, but because of who Ben Grimm is as a character. Ben Grimm or "The Thing" is a tragic character like all Marvel Comics characters. He's a tough guy, but he's not a jerk. He's a lover and he feels due to his appearance that now he will never find love because he looks like a monster.
I was really thinking about how perfect this nickname is on par with "Girly Burly". Ben Grimm is known as "The ever-lovin' blue-eyed Thing". He's this gentle man who was transformed into a "monster" by a freak space accident, but deep inside is a gentle heart that has won him the love of a sculptor and made him a great uncle to his best friend Reed Richards two children. Zach is this husky, strong country boy, but who is also the most jolly, kindest guy any of his friends have ever met. Zach has a constant antagonist (me) just like Ben Grimm does from his teammate the Human Torch who constantly antagonizes him in an effort to redirect his thoughts from his condition. Plus he has Class 10 strength just like Ben Grimm.
* Hacksaw Jim Duggan (myself) - Zach has a wrestling background, a beard and he's a big guy. If he had a mullet and a pair of wrestling briefs, he would be a spot on look alike for this classical professional wrestler. Zach's such a good wrestler that it's a veritable ritual that I antagonize Zach into a faux wrestling match and he gets me into a "Lion Tamer" submission hold.
*Bubba (Abe & Ash) - As we continued to get to know Zach, we got to know his family and the fact that his family called him Bubba. And Zach calls his brother Caleb "Bubba" too. So it just stuck, but this is mostly just used by the KC Deaver's.
* Kung Fu Panda (myself) - This name was really only used at Jake's wedding because Zach was trying to kick me to fend off my antagonizing. He was doing this stupid backwards kick and it just came to me in a moment of genius.
*Zak Attack (Guru) - Pretty self-explanatory. It's a rhyming nickname. Again, this one is mostly just used by the Guru.
*Zach Springsteen (Glenn) - I don't think anybody has ever thought of this melding of idol and idolizer before, but it's genius.
* Zach Armstrong (myself) - Um, I received a picture of Zach in this bicycling outfit. I had heard him talk about bikes a couple of times this summer and that he's been riding kinda alot with Abe, but this is beyond dedication.
Beyond...
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