O Death, thy has a sting...

...I have seen thy sting work its poisons and witnessed the bitter fruits of thy victory.

Paul and Hosea were wrong.

Sherrie, Lynette's sister-in-law stands atop mortality's precipice and the Reaper begins to roll the film of her life before her eyes. He does not smile, he does not take joy in the inevitable reality, nor does he feel remorse in fulfilling his duties. Death simply must come to claim us all.

I think Lynette and I saw her on July 6th and she still looked like Sherrie, just thin and gaunt. Then a week later...a WEEK later...her health had rapidly declined. a third of her hair had fallen out and she had gotten even worse.

The doctors did not expect her to survive the weekend of July 17-19th. That kind of suspense is awful. I had to force Lynette to go to Las Vegas. She almost cancelled her trip that she had been planning for months in advance with two of her best friends. I insisted that she go because she needed to get away from the situation.

Danny went to Shane's ("your friend in the diamond business") to get personalized rings that the kids can wear around their neck on chains. They each have an inscription on them, a message from their mother. Danny had Sherrie give Lillyn (Lynette's niece) hers, but she was not strong enough to give Devan's to him.

...

Sherrie survived. Only to get weaker and weaker as the days went on.

She had been taken off her nutrients IV which had given the family the idea that she was out of time. Turns out she should have never been taken taken off of it, somebody had simply read the charts wrongly. So they hooked her back up to it, but it had been about a week without it.

Her body is gaunt. Yet she looks like she is nine months pregnant. That's how big the mass in her stomach has grown too.

They tried to get a feeding tube into her so that she could get stronger and then they could do stronger rounds of chemotherapy and attack the cancer cells. The feeding tube could not reach her stomach. The mass was to the feeding tube as orange skin is to a straw in a Tropicana commercial.

That was medical science's last chance. The doctors could do nothing else for her. So Danny started getting things into order to bring her home, because thanks to capitalistic greed and turning people's health into a business (God Bless the fuckin' USA right), hospitals are really expensive to sleep in.

She came home on Saturday, her birthday. She turned 42. She spent the evening in bed. We ate her ice cream cake for her.

Sunday she was a new creature. Human only in form. She could barely whisper. She asked Lynette if she could go shopping. Lynette said "Maybe". She slept or puked up a brown liquid (the color of old blood it turns out). I was to entertain the kids so that the adults could rest, play Wii (Lynette just got one...the kids love it...playing video games with a five and three year old...not fun...), or pay bills. Lynette and I left around nine and went to see friends at Houlihan's. We both agreed that we needed to spend time doing at least something fun, since we had one of the most draining days of our lives.

(Our friend Greg made this profound statement about how he had not talked about it, but did not want to come off as if he were ignoring this really significant event in our lives, but he figured that if we were hanging out that we probably needed something to take our mind off things. TO ALL OF OUR FRIENDS FROM ME...and I am sure Lynette would agree...if we were hanging out with you and we did not bring up the situation then we did not need to talk about it. Greg was absolutely correct and insightful. We just needed you all to be you and love on us and help us have good times. Thank you.)

Monday I was asked to come get the kids because Sherrie's health had only gotten worse. Danny did not want them around when their mother died.

...but I'm Tone, so of course nothing went as planned...

Simien stayed in town for another night, so I stayed at Lynette's because there is no room for him at my mom's. I got a block from Lynette's and my car died. So I walked back to her house to get her gas can. I borrowed Simen's car to get a gallon of gas. Drove his car back to Lynette's, walked back to my car and then headed out. On the way I had to stop by Providence Medical Center where Lynette was working to get money for tissues, because Sherrie was out. Stopped at the new Wolf Creek supermarket in Basehor to get those. Cashier looked at me like I was the first "darkie" she had ever seen.

Then I finally made it to Danny & Sherrie's. Ended up playing with the kids for a few hours because Danny wanted to wait until Sherrie's parents made it. That way they could say goodbye to Sherrie and see the kids for a little bit.

Sherrie's poor mother Bert, as if watching your child die is not enough, also has to deal with a recovering husband. Sherrie's dad Gary had a heart attack over the weekend.

So finally Danny came and told me to take the kids if I wanted. So we went to Chieftain Park in Tonganoxie (pretty nice actually...but I could not hang with that heat), so we went to my mom's house to get some snacks, and then I took them to Lynette's house to hangout. I did find handling them all night. Our friend Katrina, who is also a neighbor, came over with brownies and hung out for like half an hour. The kids and I watched TV and played video games and went to sleep.

I started writing this entry on Sunday (the first two sentences and two paragraphs), I wrote the next four paragraphs on Monday, and I'm finishing today on Tuesday. Sherrie lost her battle with cancer and passed away this morning at 1:35am after she stopped breathing.

Death's sting:

(Yes, Sherrie was a Christian, so she is in a better place, she is with Jesus, she is no longer in constant pain. But that does not mean there is not suffering and pain and collateral damage left behind in Death's wake.)

Since the news, the lives of Lynette & Danny's parents have been upended as they have become nearly permanent fixtures at Danny's house or at the KUMed hospital rooms Sherrie stayed in. Linda is moving with Danny to Idaho where he will start a new job until he can find a nanny for the kids. So Dan will be wifeless at home for a while. Heaven help us.

Sherrie's mom and dad have lost their only child. Bert was at KUMed just as much as Linda and Dan.

Danny has to raise two kids by himself for the rest of his life, unless he remarries. He lost the woman he loved most in the world.

Lynette has been an emotional wreck since the news of Sherrie's cancer. I, Las Vegas, and our friends have done our best to help distract her.

And worst of all Lillyn and Devan will grow up without a mom at such tender young ages of 3 and 5 years old. Just awful. I cannot even imagine what it will be like when it sinks in for them that mommy will not be around again.

"O Death, where is thy sting?"

Maybe you could say other misleading things like:

"O Child Birth, where is thy pain?"

"O Hemmorhoids, where is thy anal irritation?"

"O Menstruation, where is thy blood?"

"O Chinese food, where is thy 30 minute later hunger pangs?"

...

I'll fly away, oh glory, I'll fly away
When I die, hallelujah by and by, I'll fly away

Just a few more weary days and then, I'll fly away
To a land where joy will never end, I'll fly away

I'll fly away, oh glory, I'll fly away
When I die, hallellujah by and by, I'll fly away